There were a lot of things I wanted to do these past two months, with resting and relaxing being the major one. While these past two months were rather easy-going, I never really got to relax all that much and catch up on games since I've stagnated on completing games the past few months. Starting back from Autumn, I went from working on multiple remixes, to doing a temporary job, to organizing my year's work, to creating new music for the RPG of my friend's friend, to finishing up the video compilation of the past 4 years of gaming to finally helping creating a website for a family friend to market her book. It's not even high stress work, and yet I feel so wiped. Not to mention I haven't been sleeping well the past few months because my mattress has become lumpy and sunk in (my new mattress arrived this morning) and I've been having exhausting dreams (sometime nightmares) every other night. I can hardly imagine all my friends and family that are working a full-time job, in a relationship or already married while taking care of kids, and getting the minimal required amount of sleep each day.
I feel kind of numb whenever I think about my life at this exact moment, and I'm not sure what I want to do about it. I haven't been feeling as motivated to work on anything new, possibly because I've been "working non-stop" for the past few months and just don't want to do anything. What I really want to do is play videogames and catch up on my backlog. I'm gonna try to do that the next few days and sort out the next few months. So far, I plan on working on new remixes and compositions in March, read books in April, and then start figuring out what to put together for my new portfolio and look for open positions to apply jobs for in May. Once June arrives, I know I'll be distracted again with Electronic Entertainment Expo, Steam Summer Sale, Summer Games Done Quick, and EVO just around the corner. From July onward, I'm going to have to figure out later because I really don't know where I'm headed in my life or what I want anymore. Right now, I just want to play videogames.
I do have to say, I started getting into a routine everyday of doing floor exercises to build up strength, trying to tighten that gut, and doing "some" cardio. I haven't done cardio for months now and I can feel my body craving it. But this routine I have going is pretty good. I started around the time I was working that temporary job (around mid-December) because I knew I'd be sitting all day. On Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, I would do push-ups every :00 and squats every :30 throughout the day. On Sundays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays, I would do planking every :00 and horse stance (think of squats, but staying in squatted position. A common exercise for martial arts) every :30 throughout the day. When I first started, I would do 10 push-ups and squats each set and finish with around 50-60 push-ups and squats each day. I would do 30 seconds of planking and horse stance each set. Now, I'm able to do 25 push-ups each set and 30 squats each set with around 150-180 push-ups and squats each day. For planking, I do 90 seconds a set and 80 seconds for horse stance. I do feel stronger and healthier doing these exercises, but I haven't gotten any lighter (I'm stuck at 155 lbs. I'm trying to get below 140 lbs.). There are things I still need to do: eat less (carbs, mostly), drink more water (which I've been doing pretty well the past few years), sleep/wake earlier (which I've been doing REALLY bad at), and getting back into cardio. Overall, I'm a lot more active on taking care of my health than before.
Throughout January, I played a lot of Monster Hunter: Iceborne. It's all I really did, as far as I could remember when I wasn't working. February, I spent playing a lot of misc. games here and there. I finished Remnant with my friends and that game was a lot of fun. Some of the major games I finished playing these past two months are: River City Girls, Insurgency Sandstorm, Gunvolt Chronicles: Luminous Avenger iX, Monster Hunter World: Iceborne, Remnant: From the Ashes, and Blaster Master Zero 2 (which I finished last night). I often find myself with this weird anxiety of deciding what to play each time I sat down to play something. I look through my long list of games and think "I want to play all of them, but I don't have time to play all of them". This problem has persisted for many years now, and the best I've done is narrow my steam games to four games, or at least one game of each genre so I have something to play for each type of game, 1 game per console, or just playing a game I really felt like playing at that moment so I don't waste so much time sitting there and looking at my list of games (I've wasted literal hours doing this throughout the years). This has kept me a bit more focused on finishing games and prioritizing them, but I also end up thinking about other games when I'm playing a priority game. I imagine I'm not the only one that has this problem because most people that have a lot of games like I do will often not finish a game and move onto another game. People that have very few games generally don't have this problem because they'll either play the game that they have at hand or do something else during their free time. I just want to finish up some games right now so I can bring in a new batch of games to prioritize. It doesn't help that I like RPGs so much, because they take so dang long to finish. I finished The Alliance Alive on 3DS last week, and I've had that cartridge in my 3DS for nearly 2 years!
Overall, I think I'm doing okay. The world; however, doesn't seem to be doing very well starting off this year and decade. International tension escalated after an assassination took place in Iraq. An illness spreading around China, Asia, and now the rest of the world caused by what's known as the Corona Virus has killed over 2000 people and infected more than 75,000 people. Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gianna, and quite a few other people died in a helicopter crash (I'm not a huge basketball fan, but this news was devastating and hard for me to hear). And now, our country is getting close to voting for our next president for the next 4 years and a lot of people are nervous about ALL potential candidates.
As worried as I am about all these world news, I'm just tired and want to play some videogames. I think I'll do just that.
